From The Worst-Case Scenario Junior Edition comes these hilarious tips on what to do about unpleasant foods at mealtime. How many of these did you do when you were a kid? How many have you caught your kids trying to do?
How to Clean Your Plate of Something You Hate
* Sauce it up – Disguise the taste of something disgusting with a generous helping of something tastier. To avoid getting caught, put the condiment on the side of your plate instead of pouring it directly on your food. Use your fork to push bite-sized pieces through the pool of sauce. Now lift that forkful of yuck to your mouth and stay focused on the taste of the sauce—chew quickly, swallow, and repeat.
* Breath to Relieve – Once you start chewing, begin blowing air out of your nose in quick, short bursts. Concentrating on your breathing not only gets you to think less about the food, it prevents you from smelling it. The end result? You’ll barely be able to taste it (because taste and smell are linked).
* Flush it Away – If your meal is so bad that swallowing it is making you gag, then turn to your best ally in this situation: your drink. Chew a small portion of food at a time, and then take a sip of your drink to ease it down.
* Bread it – A simple dinner roll can be a lifesaver when you’re faced with a dreadful dinner. Bread is especially good when you don’t like the texture of your food (like if it’s slimy). Just take a bite of bread with every bite of slime. The blandness of the bread will also help mask bad flavors.
* Practice “Mind Over Meal” – In extreme cases, you may need to call upon your imagination. Consider it a challenge to see if you can imagine that the liver you’re eating is actually a delicious grilled steak.
* Disguise it with Mashed Potatoes – If you really can’t deal with the taste, the thick white-ness of mashed potatoes provides the perfect cover for the horror on your plate. Lift the mashed potatoes with your fork, and slide that unwanted crud under the cloud of mashed mush using your knife. Other useful places to stow food are under a helping of peas or chunky applesauce. Try cutting your food into tiny pieces first—this makes it easier to hide.
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